"Lack of Capacity for Understanding Women's Health"

I had a gynaecological appointment.

First off, I phoned the hospital and it was confirmed that I was to see a woman for the appointment.

This did not happen.

I have severe anxiety and trauma from being sexually assaulted and always ask to see women due to this.

Not only this but I have severe anxiety about having to see medical staff due to facing unprofessional, dismissive GPs and hospital staff for years.

So I was already stressed out and annoyed at having been lied to and now having to deal with an uncomfortable situation. Yet, due to waiting 18months+ for the appointment, I had no option. Let alone waiting 21 years to get this far in diagnosis.

The appointment started out as all of them do, my symptoms and experiences with health being dismissed due to them being outwith the norm and myself being treated like I'm wasting time, I'm lying, I'm exaggerating, I'm not following medical advice etc.

One of the main reasons I keep attempting to get help and diagnosis for my health is because all of the advice given does not work for me. I am following it entirely and it just doesn't work. Hence my frustrations at being treated like a dumb patient or a hypochondriac. I feel like I am not treated like a capable patient or human being.

Luckily for me, despite the slightly off beside manner received, I underwent an examination, which was terrifying for me. Despite the staff members dismissive comment about it being nothing to worry about. It feels very different to go through and just because you can stomach it, does not make it easy.

Thankfully I finally got the diagnosis and appropriate treatment put in place. The staff member was not terrible, just simply could not comprehend anything I was going through nor did they stop themselves from making assumptions about my lifestyle. 

But why was there no understanding in the very beginning? 

Why am I always dismissed? Not believed? Accused of being too stupid to know my own body?

I'm very pleased that the staff do not believe anything is a problem in life, but some of us have to face a very different reality that is not so pleasant. 

Unfortunately it's not just this appointment where I've had to face belittlement, being patronised about my health, and being dismissed as just a woman who doesn't know her own body.