"Upset and angry at lack of maternity care"

As a first time mum I am absolutely horrified at the care, or lack of, I have received throughout this journey. 

My pregnancy was consultant lead, my husband has a hereditary bleeding disorder which meant we would be under the care of a certain Doctor that I felt had little to no personal skills or bedside manner.

Due to the risk of this bleeding disorder I was advised that during labour and delivery there would be no intervention - forceps etc - this advice was echoed 4 times by this doctor to both my husband and I on separate occasions.

So with the support of my community midwife I decided that a C-section would be the best and safest option to deliver my baby. At a later appointment our Doctor left me waiting for 45 minutes, while they checked their notes to see where they had recommended this. They then asked why I thought a 50/50 chance of a hereditary bleeding disorder would mean I should have a C-section.

They did not once ask if this had been something I chosen for myself, nor did they acknowledge that I was sitting in front of them in floods of tears while they discussed amniocentesis at 36 weeks - because if they could rule out the bleeding disorder then I was not to have the procedure.

At 37 weeks pregnant I had a final growth scan and clinic appointment where our Doctor stated that they were not going to argue with me if I want a C-section, that it was my choice but not something they would recommend. To suggest arguing with a patient for making a choice is disgusting. 

5 weeks later, on the morning of my C-section, the Doctor was performing the first surgery. I was leaving the ward to go to the bathroom when they were walking down the corridor and barged me out of the way, followed by slammed a door in my face. I don’t care how qualified they are, in my opinion they do not deserve the position they have. 

My C-section was amazing, I cannot thank the team who performed it, or supported me in recovery, enough.

I was then transferred to ward 31B - where I saw or spoke to no one for 6 hours. The dayshift team should be disgusted and ashamed!

I was left by myself for 6 hours -other than having the occasionally paracetamol thrown my way - before a member of staff spoke to me - to say that I should not have 3 people at my bedside. How was I supposed to know when no one spoke to me for 6 hours? I asked who was taking care of me to be told the name of a staff member. I let them know no one had been in to see me and that I came up from recovery a while ago I was told my observations would be done 4 hourly.

A member of staff appeared an hour later with an injection, left it on a ledge on my baby's cot and told me to take it when my visitors had gone…an injection!

The nightshift staff member introduced themselves, and was pleasant but that’s about it, obviously at night there isn’t much chat or pleasantries so they weren't able to do much to recover the damaged caused by their colleagues. 

I had decided to breastfeed my baby, not that anyone asked or cared in my opinion, and felt there was absolutely no support for this. It turns out that my baby was not latching properly and therefore lost a considerable amount of weight over the following few days. 

The next morning the same member of staff as the day before greeted the 2 ladies in beds beside me, asked how they were doing etc, and I felt ignored the fact I was even in the room. I then didn’t see a soul until my baby had their hearing screened and a paediatrician came to give a final check before I was then sent home. 

I chose to have a C-section so that I wouldn’t have a traumatic labour and then need an emergency due to there being no intervention available but never would have thought that spending time on a ward would have been as traumatic as it was.

As a first time mum I’m devastated that this is the level of care I have received, I’m so thankful and lucky that I have an amazing support network around me to help and advise me when I need it. But can’t help think about if I didn’t. 

As an NHS employee myself I’m absolutely horrified at this. I would never treat patients this way. I understand completely that wards are busy places - but it takes less than 10 seconds to introduce yourself and say you'll be taking care of them, especially when every time my husband left/returned to the ward there was a gathering of folk chatting, laughing, eating etc at the desk. 

If someone could get in touch with me regarding this that would be great as this doesn’t even scratch the surface on how angry and upset I am at the care I have received.